Sometimes things catch you off-guard.
You go looking for BIG revelations in retreats or when reading books and it never pans out and then you go about your normal stuff and BAMM it hits you.
The sun is out in London today and it’s a big thing because we haven’t seen the sun in a bit. I sprang into action, put my trainers on and headed straight to Gladstone Park.
And I forced myself to do something I don’t usually do – I forced myself to remain present and pay attention instead of being caught up in my usual thought process (what the F* am I doing with my life, I need to clean the kitchen, I need some chocolate, you know the drill).
The once bare trees were heady with green leaves, the flowers were proudly sticking their necks out, the fields were littered with golden flowers and the birds and the bees were out in full-force. This was LIFE in technicolour.
Not the life we live going about our daily routine but LIFE, the force we all seem to have within us or chi, as the Chinese call it. No one can prove it’s there but we seem to feel it’s presence from time to time.
And today while I was amongst the trees, birds, bees, I suddenly felt ALIVE. I was in no way different from what was going on around me.
“We are a way for the universe to know itself. Some part of our being knows this is where we came from. We long to return. And we can, because the cosmos is also within us. We’re made of star stuff,” Carl Sagan.
The mental chattering stopped. The world felt large, welcoming. It didn’t matter that I didn’t know what to do, it didn’t matter that my to-do list was a mile long. It was all okay. I was still part of LIFE and it was big enough to accept everything.
I swear I haven’t been drinking.